Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Letting Go

It's finally hitting me - my wedding isn't going to look "blogworthy." Which I already knew and thought I was okay with, but... apparently it's not as easy to nurture the eff it ethos now as it is to bravely state what you wish you felt. I've been wishing for the emotional ability to disengage from the unnecessary pretties associated with weddings and for the emotional ability to focus in on the few physical details that matter most. And yet, I can't. At least, I can't just yet. Even though my brain knows better, my soul is still a teeny bit wrapped up in believing that a gorgeous wedding is somehow better than a less physically gorgeous event:
  • I can't let go of my idiotic angst about our ugly chairs, nor can I seem to design magical cheapo nature-inspired succulent wedding centerpieces that tie in the black-and-silver chairs with the rustic brick-and-wood backdrop.  I thought I had finally found some chic sliver goblet things in a thrift store that might fit the bill, but I left the store without buying them and missed my "perfect centerpiece" opportunity. Oh, and the succulents I've been trying to grow are wilting anyhow.
  • I cannot seem to make our email save the dates nor our blog-powered wedsite look remotely polished. I cannot integrate our Google-based survey into our wordpress-powered wedsite. And I frankly cannot give a d*mn anymore. In our push to finally send the darn emails already, I'm giving up. I'm waving the white flag. I'm finally admitting that pretty oftentimes has to give way to practicality. I have zero time. Jason has zero time. And I don't want to spend my two hours of non-errand-full weekend time trying to design a "perfect" save the date. 
  • I got a quote on embroidery for our chuppah that would cost us $3,000. Our chuppah idea is the wedding "detail" that matters most to me out of everything, so I'm trying to pick my jaw off the floor and find more affordable, and hopefully just as meaningful, options. (If anyone knows what embroidery should cost or where to go in Los Angeles for help, I'd love your insight please)    
I wish I could throw money at these projects, but our budget is battered. I wish I could throw time at these projects, but time is in even shorter supply than money. And so, I'm finally admitting that I'm not Superwoman, and that whatever we have will be good enough. Good enough is hardly a wedding rallying cry, I know. But good enough will have to do. Ugly chairs will seat all our beautiful family and friends. Ikea planters will win over complexly, beautifully, thrifted centerpieces because with Ikea a) I only need one shopping trip and b) we can transport the planter boxes to the wedding site more easily than 800 mismatched vintage pieces. Our constantcontact/mailchimp/verticalresponse-designed save the date (whichever we can figure out most easily) will do just fine, because it won't get caught in a spam filter and it will have a pretty picture from our engagement shoot. Our wedsite isn't even pretending to be witty or pretty anymore: we just threw up some information and a photo and we're over it. 

I spent a good day debating whether we could just pay someone to make our save-the-date and website troubles go away. But I'm running up against the limit of our practical reality, and that means I'm finally giving up on a lot of pretties. If I've finally said eff it to the pretty website and save the date (because it turns out my DIY skills and patience are more limited than is necessary for weddingland pretty) then my guess is I'll say eff it to dozens more weddingland pretties along the way too. My soul hurts a little bit when I admit this to myself, because I really truly believed I was going to have a super stylish wedding, DIY incompetence and budget notwithstanding.

I haven't read the design-oriented wedding blogs in ages. I thought this distance and my eff it mantras made me immune to their siren call to stylish insanity. Alas, no. Because even if I'd stopped reading those blogs, I've been holding tight to the image they've created, stored deep in my weddinbrain recesses, of what a chic wedding looks like. And my wedding simply can't measure up, visually. I don't have a team of designers. I don't have the time (or frankly, the interest) in DIYing it all myself. And as this reality slowly sinks in, my brain is thanking me for finally, truly, letting go. Their images are undeniably chic and stunning, but me and my wedding are finally learning to content with our messy authenticity.

41 comments:

  1. Dude. You have a blog about your wedding that lots of people come to read every day because they find it so damn interesting. You ALREADY have a blog-worthy wedding, silly!

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  2. What you see as ugly, easy options, other people will see as something into which you put hours of thought. Or they will see the style which will be so clearly there in your 'messy authenticity'.

    When I was at school, i played in the orchestra. Needless to say, being children, we made mistakes all the time. But the wonderful music teacher and conductor always drilled into us: When you go wrong, or when someone else does, don't stop. Don't draw attention to it, just carry on. No one will ever notice.

    I've found it a good life mantra ever since. Those things you think are a mess? Chances are someone else loves them, and most people won't even give them a second's thought. Try to embrace your choices and think about what you gain from making them - money and freedom (not least from debt).

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  3. I don't think your chairs are ugly.

    Anyway, have you seen this site?

    http://www.save-on-crafts.com/

    It's full of inexpensive stuff you can just throw down and go. What about clipping some birds to branches on the tables? Especially that glitter sparrow under the "What's New?" section.

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  4. Handmade Wood Bird Glitter Sparrow - $7

    http://www.save-on-crafts.com/glitterbirds.html

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  5. One of my favorite things about you and your blog is your self-awareness. Yes, it's much harder to change your emotions to what you wish you felt, but you recognize that, at least.

    If you have the time/energy/desire to email me about your wedsite and the Google survey, I can try to help out, if you'd like. Consider a thank you for being such a great voice in the 'indie bride blogger' community (whatever that means, I just made it up).

    Or, what might work is if you create a Google site and put a widget on a page there that embeds your Google survey. Then, go into the HTML and copy out the bit of code for the widget that does the embedding and paste it into your Wordpress site. I haven't worked with Wordpress before, I just have self-taught knowledge on HTML. Or perhaps consider transferring things to Google Sites overall, it's easy enough to integrate things and you can get themed designs. Not as nice as Wordpress designs yet, I think, but not bad, and easy.

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  6. Rent a stunning Huppah for $150.

    http://www.huppah.com/

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  7. @Kerry - ha. You know I meant the design-y blogs. Again, I'm letting go of caring (please zen, hit soon) but the only blog this wedding would get posted is here and perhaps a few of the non-fancy sites. I don't really want my wedding all over the internet anyhow, so I'm okay with that. Which is why it's even weirder that I want it to look fancy enough for SMP or Martha or whatever.

    Claire - oh yes. I approach public speaking the same way. Don't show you made a mistake and no one will notice. And that will happen with the wedding too. But here, at least, I can share my sillies with all of you. At the wedding, I am going to rock my cheap and easy papel picado and no one will be any the wiser. Good reminder.

    KWu - thanks for the offer, truly, but google forms don't integrate into our wedsite platform (as I'm discovering via too many google searches.) And we're sticking with our blog platform for a number of reasons, so oh well. Our guests can click on a link and they'll be okay. Really.

    @Anonymous - thanks for the chuppah link... but I guess I was talking about a very personal project. We have our poles and the fabric we want to use. It's just a question of the design. Though at this point, who knows?

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  8. Hugs first.

    Reason second. Here's what I think: I think your venue is gorgeous. GORGEOUS. Blog-worthy gorgeous. And the chairs? I hardly notice them in that picture. It's not like they are chartreuse green after all. Ikea has cute and sleek stuff. No it's not thrifted vintage, but I'm personally drawn to minimal chicness, than the vintage/Anthro look anyways. You also have a pretty dress and will have a slammin necklace, regardless of who makes it. ;)

    So the wedsite and the save the date aren't turning out the way you envisioned them. It's ok. I keep hearing that guests don't really use them as much as us marrying couples like to think they do.

    I think realizing your wedding won't be big pretty blog worthy is a good thing to come to terms with. But if you think your wedding isn't going to be beautiful, you deserve a smack. Because it's going to be authentic, full of love, and I promise there will be style.

    And keep practicing with the succulents. They probably need more water and cooler temps? (I know nothing about growing succulents, so take this advice with a grain of salt.)

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  9. Haha yeah I know what you meant. I was hoping that my comment might redirect your attention to how much I heart your blog. I forgot that we brides are the kryptonite of redirection!

    And hey, do you ever wonder how in the hell there ARE so many weddings than end up on those sites? I've been to a gazillion weddings (this year alone!) and while they are all beautiful, none really look like THOSE. I'm baffled.

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  10. Honey, it's going to be wonderful.

    You guys are happy, your venue is stunning, your food is delicious, you have an amazing photographer. You nailed all the big stuff, so those little details are going to recede.

    Except for the chuppah detail, which is worth investigating. How detailed is the embroidery you want? I'm sure you've already considered family members, but have you canvassed friends with talent? Could several people you love potentially pass it around, thus divvying up the work? People love helping with that kind of detail - tangible and easy to grasp.

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  11. So you know how I was all kerfluffled yesterday because some jerk we know had our wedding before we did and now I'm not Original enough, or something? This is (part) of what you told me:

    "All I know is that your wedding will be yours. You and Tony and your family are at the soul of your wedding. The structure and trappings are personal, meaningful, fun, and pretty, but the heart of it is in how you lovingly crafted it yourselves and in the love you and Tony will radiate. The rest is icing on the cupcakes."

    That goes for you, too. What you and Jason pull together will be beautiful and amazing because it will be You and Jason. Somewhere in the APW archives there is a post about ugly chairs and why you won't care. And there are photos. Of a fab wedding with ugly, mismatched chairs underneath very happy guests who are playing board games in a (relatively) plain hall.

    Your wedding will be fantastic and beautiful because you will be happy and beautiful, and love radiates warmth.

    As for the embroidery, here's a suggestion: go to a fashion/design school and put up an advert. Fashion students often have fancy computer-driven sewing machines that perform embroidery. You will get a nice, deep discount because they're students; they will get some beautiful photos of their design work for their portfolio. Everyone wins. Craigslist is your friend.

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  12. @Rachel - We don't have many friends who embroider, but I will send out an email, just in case. Thanks.

    @Sarah - Oh, my brain knows it, and my heart is just starting to catch up. And I've seen the ugly-chair weddings. Some days I'm sane and reasonable and other days I wantwantwant white chairs that cost $3.50 per chair instead of our free black-and-silver ones, price be darned. Um, no. Because in my core, I know that you and I are right in the long-term: Eff pretty chairs, focus on the parts we've lovingly created and ways we make the wedding ours.

    Good idea though on the embroidery. I will be contacting FIDM to see. The local sewing shop quoted me $20 per simple design element (and I mean SIMPLE and SMALL) on their fancy digital sewing machine... and we have 150 design elements so NO. Students would probably do it for a full-project lump sum. Good call.

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  13. Honey, don't you get it yet? Your wedding IS going to be super stylish, because it's going to be you. (Besides, Kelly will make it look that way even if it's not, magic!)

    I've seen the chairs, they are totally unnoticeable. Centerpieces are the one thing I'd skip if I could go back, because once there is food on long tables you can't even see them, so it's a total waste of energy. I'm not even going to respond to your save the date and wedsite fears, because even doing those things is unnecessary.

    And you want a chic and meaningful huppah? Get out a tallis. Free. And it couldn't mean more. PLUS? You create a family heirloom, and every time you use it, you feel wrapped in your commitment. I'm still struck with that each time David wraps me in his along with him at Yom Kippur. Embroidery? It's labor intensive. It should be expensive. And you don't need it.

    You have yourselves and THAT IS ENOUGH. If it took a budget meltdown to make you see that, I'm kind of glad for it...

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  14. @Meg - Yeah, I get it, but it's taken awhile for my brain and wantwantwant needs to really get on the same page. And I KNOW it's all so silly, which is why I feel silly that I care, but I do. At least I'm starting to get over the silliness, out of necessity.

    And as for the chuppah, I'm now going to share the details here, but it really was the most important "detail" we had planned. We are trying to make a new family heirloom that echoes rituals and heirlooms from Jason's family, in a way that felt Oh-so-perfectly-right the moment we settled on it. We have a way to reuse the chuppah cloth again and again in important rituals. And our tallit are too small anyhow. So now, we'll need to reassess, and it's hard. I expected an expense, just not $3000 worth. Eek.

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  15. @Rachel - very true. Or you could throw out details of the embroidery project to your readers here? Some of us (maybe lurkers, but longtime readers!) are arty types who, depending on what you're looking for, would probably be happy to help out for a LOT less than $3000. ;)

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  16. Have you tried using Etsy Alchemy for Chuppah Embroidery? Otherwise, I'm thinking that somewhere in Chinatown or the Fashion District or Koreatown may have that availability for less but I have no idea.

    One of my friends had her sister make their chuppah using needlepoint (rather than machine embroidery). Another one sent each guest a swatch of fabric to decorate with the invitation (and mail back to them) and then they sewed them together for the edge of the chuppah (a similar idea is what $2000 Wedding Sara did which was having each guest mail them a fabric swatch of meaning); if you do either of those I'd be happy to help piece the fabric together for nada (and I live in LA).

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  17. "I'm not even going to respond to your save the date and wedsite fears, because even doing those things is unnecessary."

    Agree. Totally. Those are "details" that guests will definitely pass right over without notice.

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  18. HUGS!! I don't have much more than that at the moment, but you've got them. It only takes a few good pictures for a "blogworthy" wedding, and I'm sure yours will be beautiful even if it's not exactly what you'd envisioned. So don't lose heart! Maybe zen isn't what you need to be so much as absolutely committed to flexibility. :)

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  19. I don't know if I've commented before, but have enjoyed being on the journey (again) with you... and while I don't think I was in quite as dire of a situation (financially or time-wise), I think I came head-to-head with this sometime in the 3 months of our engagement (it worked out better that way). We ended up with ugly plastic white "garden" chairs for the reception (REALLY WHITE) and used more-or-less generic centerpieces from the venue (wrought iron candleabras)..... but you know what, as much as I still remember those things and WISH I had had the money or time to canvass beautiful vintagey moderny (ironic, eh?) chairs and scour shops for vases and/or whatever else people put on tables nowadays...... we got married. and it was worth it. sending you hugs and encouragement via the interwebs.

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  20. I knew I wasn't going to have a blogworthy wedding. I had enough stress and hassle as it was to worry about making things look lovely and gorgeous. I was disappointed with our website, because I could have done a lot more to make it killer, but in the end I cheated by using a premade Tumblr template and just changed the background image and the font. That's all. And that's around the time I threw out caring about details and focused on just making ends meet. Getting stuff done. It didn't matter if it matched anything else, or if it was even thematic. At the last minute before the wedding I realized we needed to label the desserts and other items, and instead of doing something cute and creative and stylish we just printed out black text on cardstock, folded them over and stood them up on the tables. Overall it was messy, imperfect, and scattered.

    But then I got the pictures back? And I was like, holy sh*t. These make it look like I had some super romantic, brightly-colored, stylish shindig. My wedding looked hip. My wedding looked (almost) blogworthy. And I got confused. Really, really confused.

    We view these other "stylish" weddings through an inverted lens. We obviously can't possibly know that the lush, gorgeous garden the happy couple appear to be standing in is really just one flowery bush near the back of the venue, or that to the right of the awesome centerpieces on the tables there was a godawful tangle of cords and an electrical box. We can't possibly know that the bride in question ever had doubts about HER chairs, because they look so neat in that sweeping afternoon sunlight! How could she have ever doubted THAT? It looks so polished. So planned.

    I thought a lot of my ish was ugly, or half-hearted. I was surprised to get compliments on them in the end. Turns out that others don't always have the same opinions I do. Turns out what I thought was semi-awful was kinda rad to some. Turns out that sometimes I'm too critical.

    I hate to end this by saying "it'll all pull together in the end." Because that makes it seem like we all need to stop thinking and just be happy, because the magical wedding fairies will come along and make it all sparkly and perfect! So maybe I'll just say this instead: in the end, you'll look over all you've accomplished and feel kinda proud. Maybe -- MAYBE! -- you'll even say, that email didn't look THAT bad. Maybe you'll be surprised to get compliments on your work from others. You'll probably just be pleasantly surprised, period.

    Awesome photography doesn't hurt things, either.

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  21. My mother made a quilt for our chuppah, she hand stitched the design, but then she took it to a pro to do the finishing and some major embroidery - it cost about $250.

    I live in LA so if you want to see it (it's awesome) and see if it's similar to what you are thinking, I will happily share the contact info for this woman. The pictures I have just don't do the detail justice AT ALL. She's in Colorado, but her work is amazing, she is affordable and I'm sure you could work out your design through emails and phone calls.

    Seriously, I'm at melbrides at gmail.com if you want to talk about it.

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  22. @LALove
    It might be worth it then, honestly. Bottom line? That's what credit cards are for. REALLY worth it things, bone deep worth it things, that you'll pay off over the next year. Ask your shul. I'm sure they've gotten things embrodered before.

    And hey, if you need to go with a tallis, you can borrow one (someone in your family or shul has full size), or buy. I bought David a tallis as his wedding present (it's traditional), and I spent mayb $200 for a really fancy white one.

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  23. And I think you missed my point, which is that you WILL have a blog worthy weddding. All this stuff you're saying you won't have and you have to get over it? What I'm saying is that you already have it.

    Now I'll shut up.

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  24. you know what? I have not given the ugly, mismatched chairs one minute of thought since our wedding. Same for our very practical aka ugly buffet table. I made my in-laws a photo album of the wedding, and I didn't include any detail shots except the cake (my MIL made it). They just don't seem important anymore... the guests' faces and bubbly smiles seem more memorable.

    I can now admit that I still held some tiny hope (I honestly don't even know why) that our wedding would be "stumbled upon" by one of the design-y blogs (and our photog actually submitted our wedding to about 10 or so, as she's trying to grow her business), without my even trying/appearing to care. Well, that didn't happen. And seriously and for real? I'm over it. And I swear I'm not just saying that. Don't get me wrong - I agonized over the prettiness factor quite a bit beforehand, and even immediately afterward. I wanted that external validation, for some reason - that our wedding was a "success"? That my diy hard work was noticed? I don't know.

    I think sometimes the authentic letting go can't happen until it's impossible to do anything else (like 5 min before the ceremony LOL).

    What I have re-read and thought about are my vows. I know this sounds like the goody-two shoes answer of "what matters most," but it's true - it's the one thing I keep thinking about... wondering if I'm doing all i can to live up to the promises i made. because it's all well and good to write lovely vows that make your parents cry, but I want to make sure i don't throw them out the window the minute I'm asked to actually put the tough stuff into practice. :P

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  25. @Meg - No worries, I'm there with you. I know our photographer Kelly will give us a "blogworthy" wedding look (because she's amazing like that) but I guess the point is that I'm beyond caring whether that "look" happens. I'm having a me-and-Jason-worthy wedding, and that's the point. And there will be some pretties to match (mostly the site. I was very smart about picking the site) and the rest that I toss won't matter because the stuff that we're keeping DOES. Which I already know in my sane moments. Though reminders always help.

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  26. @Kerry: "do you ever wonder how in the hell there ARE so many weddings than end up on those sites? I've been to a gazillion weddings (this year alone!) and while they are all beautiful, none really look like THOSE. I'm baffled."

    haha YES! I have never, ever been to a wedding like anything featured on any of those websites!

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  27. I think we get stuck on hunting down vintage pieces because the DIY Wedding Industrial Complex keep featuring that stuff.

    But hey, something like a Homegoods store or any modern retail store will have eye catching objects to decorate with that won't break the bank.

    I actually think tabletop decor is the easiest part if you can look at all objects the way an artist would.

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  28. Vis a vis the succulents: my hen-and-chicks take MUCH more water than their inherent nature would have you believe. Add water. And good luck! I know everything will turn out fine (cheesy but true).

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  29. Checking back quickly and just saw that you have over 150 simple design elements. I don't think you'll find a professional place willing to do that for less than your current quote. Machine quilting runs around $300, and that usually only incorporates a couple of simple design elements. My understanding is that they have to program each one in, so it ends up being too time consuming.

    FDIM is a good idea, or hand embroidery if the elements are simple enough. If it's simple, willing friends don't necessarily need any experience at all. Simple embroidery is crazy easy, provided you round up people with a slight degree of hand eye coordination. It will take time, but not expertise.

    If the chuppah is your special element and you look around and can't find a lower quote (in your limited free time!) I would agree with Meg and say shell out now and pay it off later, even though I know it sounds terrifying. You'll love it forever (unlike expensive rental chairs - good for you on holding strong!).

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  30. yea... certain things we just have to let go. the closer we get to the wedding, more things get sifted out and you know what? the things that fall of the list or don't make the cut aren't important on the day of. seriously, you just forget about them and you end up focusing on the people, the moment and what's already there.

    and i agree with kerry, you already have a blog-worthy wedding. you have readers who love this space and are dying to see your wedding and hear all about it even without the silver goblets.

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  31. i wish i could put into words how not noticeable those chairs are going to be. i wish i could detail the HOURS i spent in futility trying to steam the wrinkles out of ugly, ugly chair covers. and then fretting because of how ugly the room was going to look.

    honest.

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  32. and ditto the "shell out now and pay off later" sentiment. we had to take out a little loan to cover some of the non-negotiables (we were both unemployed) and it was worth it. very worth it.

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  33. Ay. The wedding blog world...it causes just as much evil as it does good. Your wedding is going to have something only a few of those weddings have: Authenticity. It's gonna be amazing and I agree - you already have a blog worthy wedding!

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  34. I know Meg already commented a few times (hi Meg!) and everything she is saying above is totally right, but so is everything she says here:
    http://apracticalwedding.com/2009/12/lazy-and-possibly-cheap-girls-guide-to/
    Every time I worry that our wedding won't be impressive enough, or chic enough, or DIY/T enough, or whatever worry I come up with on a given day (and yes, our chairs will be both mismatched and ugly), I go back to that same post. And then I think about our photographers and breathe a sigh of relief, and crack open a beer. (I find the addition of beer works pretty well.)

    It sounds like it is 110% worth spending a chunk of money on your huppah, because it is so emotionally important - and you'll keep it. It's not passing. It's a true life investment. And meaningful more than just on a pretty level. Absolutely worth it.

    And finally, if it helps, we emailed our engagement announcement/party invite. Just a normal email, with a daffy photo of us in it.
    And we got our save the dates here:
    http://www.weddingchicks.com/category/wedding-chicks/diy-templates/templates/
    I printed them on thick cheap white card, used the work guillotine to chop them into the right shape, and sent them - I think all in all, apart from postage, they cost $15. Not unique, not our "theme", didn't care, loved them anyway. It was really easy, and that was the point for us, too.

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  35. You know what this post reminds me of... The Velveteen Rabbit! Do you remember? 'It's only after all your fur is rubbed off that you become real.' Similarly, with the wedding, it's only after all the shiny sparkly surface bits get rubbed and smudged and done hastily-at-the-last-minute and slightly over-budget and not-really-what-you-had-in-mind does it become real. Because even with all those things that didn't/ don't go quite according to plan, you still end up with the most amazing outcome! In spite of all the 'mistakes.'

    I have to tell you that our 'details' sucked. Neither of us had the time, inclination or creativity to do a lot on that front. And then, because of the amazing talent of our photographer, our wedding DID end up on one of those inspiro-blogs. It was crazy! Neither of us measures up to the Platonic Ideal of Beauty. Our designy details were minimal. However, as our photographer said, it was a day with a lot of heart, and she was able to capture that. Apparently, that alone was inspiring to other people.

    Your day will be the same. Even with black and silver chairs (that actually look pretty cool!)

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  36. I just found your site today, after desperately searching for any sane discussion of affordable weddings in LA (!) and I've spent at least an hour reading through your "Sanity Check" posts. All I can say is, your wedding is going to be completely awesome and totally blog-worthy. I know this because your posts reassured me of the same thing. We're all going to be just fine.

    If you still need web help, let me know. I'm a WordPress developer, and though I've never worked with a Wedsite before, I'm happy to dig into your Google/WordPress problem and see if I can sort it out. You can email me: melanie at ymuwp.com.

    Thanks for writing a rockin' blog. I look forward to reading more!

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  37. I agree with Meg (I want a bumper sticker!) Your wedding is totally gonna be blog worthy (whatever the eff that even means) because it is going to be totally authentic to you and Jason and you guys are awesome! It will be, feel, and look beautiful. Both on the day and later in the photos.

    And all that other shit will work itself out. As annoying as it is to hear (lots of) someones say it.

    And if the chuppah is the most important thing- then I support figuring out how to make it happen. Whether that means shelling out, or simplifying, or whatever you need to do. That's non-negotiable. Kelly will make the centerpieces look gorgeous, so I wouldn't worry about them too much.

    We had shit go wrong, and things not end up *quite how I'd pictured, but even our friends non-pro pictures hastily tossed up on facebook are awesome! They're awesome because they remind us of all the joy, fun, and amazingness of our day, not because of a single detail. And you know me- I LOVE details. :)

    So I'm still up for helping you with yours in whatever capacity you want! Just holler! :)

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  38. your chairs are NOT ugly. i had the same chairs, which came free with the venue. i considered getting different chairs...they were gold and more formal but they were $7 per chair to rent! so i said f- it and it turned out fine. honestly, everything about your wedding sounds fabulous and all the effort and thought you're putting into it will come through. seriously, i hate the term blog-worthy, but whatever that means, i'm sure that with all the planning you're putting into it - and, you have a wedding coordinator to help you! - it will be blog-worthy.

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  39. I'd share some words of wisdom here but I know a few things:
    1. The other experienced ladies have given you the right advice.
    2. It doesn't matter - the whole "getting married" thing is a process and as much as you blog about it, are self-aware, etc - the shit still feels the way it feels and you soldier through.
    3. Detailed oriented people like ourselves freak out at the unknown and when you can't put it all together at the last minute? Yeah, I feel your pain.

    Hugs to YOU! Louise

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  40. your wedding will be TOTALLY blog worthy to meeeeeeee :) so maybe that counts for something? ;)

    xoxo

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  41. God, I totally am with you.

    I am still fighting but more pedalling furiously underwater.

    Must let go, I've got almost less than a month to go now. Our wedding will be us though. Fun, slightly messy and pink!

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