Recently, life has moved from hectic-but-fulfilling-and-manageable into high-alert-there's-nothing-fulfilling-about-this stress zone. It's bad enough that, when trying to make plans with a girlfriend I haven't seen in ages, I could offer her one open Wednesday and possibly one Friday night in the next month and a half. I wish I were joking.
And somehow, in the midst of this, I'm supposed to be planning a wedding. I got an email last week saying the venue price may have gone up, but I've already been playing phone and email tag with them for weeks without any confirmations on our date. So I'm trying to sort that out while also coming up with an affordable Plan B venue option, just in case. We're trying to price out all our food choices by weighing our cost/stress/environmental options by pricing out sustainable caterers, mobile food truck catering, partial DIY food costs (appetizer, side dish, and dessert), party staffing services, rental costs, and eco-friendly disposable options. We're trying to suss out how much buses would really cost to rent, since our likely venue is poorly located for anyone who's drunk a few glasses of wine. We're trying to manage our ever growing guest list that moved far beyond our flippant estimate of 150 once we really started digging in. In other words, we're trying to figure out the real costs of this thing so we can make some real decisions about budget options and saving plans. But, with our lives hurling forward at an absurd pace and every cost-saving option up for discussion, we are even more overwhelmed. And with this much stress, the idea of actively choosing the cheaper-but-much-more-labor-and-effort intensive DIY or multiple vendor coordination option just feels exhausting. And still so expensive that I want to cry.
This is the point where my hoped-for zen comes crashing down around me in tense car-ride misunderstandings. This is where suddenly everyone decides to share their unhelpful advice and subtle (or not so subtle) judgments about how much we're spending and, contradictorily, just how cheap we're being. This is where I get nervous about what my future family will think of me and our seemingly less traditional (and apparently cheap) approach to the wedding. This is where I'm running a different spreadsheet scenario every night to figure out just how we might be able to pull this off and if there's any way around a year of pasta and peanut butter sandwiches to manage to afford this (answer: probably not.)
Yeah, just about the only thing I'm looking forward to is our upcoming mobile food truck gastronomical tour of Los Angeles. A ton of the trucks are closed for Sunday catering (boo, that's not really convenient for us) and we've only eaten at a handful for the 89 gourmet and fusion cuisine mobile food truck eateries and a handful of the authentic taco trucks in the city. It's catering research, and it's just about the only part of this planning process I'm looking forward to in the next two months. It's a silver lining made of Vietnamese-French fusion tacos and other such tastiness, and hopefully that will make everything okay (or some approximation thereof.)